Things to talk about with elderly parents on the phone
Thirty-six questions and small topics for calls with an older mother or father, sorted by the kind of day they have had, and how to end a call well.
Sunli is not ready yet. This is what we are making.
One small thing a day for the people who matter.
LenaRuthSamNoraTorontoMumStill to comeYou
Today’s card
RuthMother
Ruth sees the eye doctor at three.
Ring her after.
Your mother’s appointment on Thursday. The friend who starts a new job on Monday. Sunli keeps things like these, and each morning it puts one in front of you. You decide what each person sees of you.
How it works
Each morning, one person and one small thing.
Most of us are not careless with the people we love. We are busy, and we don’t always know what would help.
Put your people in your orbit
Your wife or husband, your parents, a friend, a colleague. Some live in your house and some are an ocean away. The closest stand nearest to you.
They write what helps, in their own words
Anyone can keep a Guide: what helps on a slow day, what not to ask at the door. They choose who reads which line.
Each morning, one small thing
A card for one person, built from what you know and what they wrote. Ring her after the appointment. Have the kettle on.
A preview of the design, captured from the prototype. The app is still being built.
Everyone has an orbit.
The people who matter to you, drawn as a small sky with you in the middle. Some of them live in your house. Some are an ocean away. One may have died, and some you haven’t met yet. All of them belong.
Near
The people you see every day
Being near someone doesn’t mean you know what would help today. Sunli gives you one thing, and often it comes from what they wrote themselves.
Far
The people a few time zones away
Sunli keeps their clock beside yours and tells you a good hour to ring. Your mother doesn’t need the app for any of this.
Remembered
Someone who died
They stay in your orbit. Their page keeps the things they always said and the dates that matter, and it goes quiet on the days that hurt. Nothing in Sunli ever speaks as them.
Still to come
When there is hardly anyone yet
Start with one name, someone you already know. Sunli suggests one small step a week towards them, and helps you write the first line.
A preview of the design, captured from the prototype. The app is still being built.
On any morning, one tap tells the people you chose how today is.
Today I
- am having a good day.
- am low on energy.
- need quiet.
- would like company.
A preview of the design, captured from the prototype. The app is still being built.
The companion
It asks when it isn’t sure.
You can type to Sunli’s companion or talk to it. Tell it your sister has moved to Toronto and it writes that on her page. If you have two sisters, it asks which one.
It is an AI with a face, so you always know what you are talking to. It doesn’t play a person, it doesn’t diagnose, and it never speaks as someone who has died.
Everything it remembers is listed in plain words. You can change any line or erase it, and then it is gone.
You decide what each person sees. Always.
These are the rules Sunli is being built by. They will be written into the privacy policy before anyone can sign up.
- Nothing you write is sold, and there are no adverts.
- Nobody sees anything about you unless you chose to show them. Every new person starts at “Nothing”.
- You can read everything the companion remembers, and erase it.
- What you tell it about one person is never used for anyone else.
- Nothing on your lock screen says what kind of day you are having.
Works today
Is it too late to ring Mum?
Pick two cities and see the hours when you are both awake, and a good time to ring. It runs in your browser and keeps nothing.
Or start with two cities
What Sunli is not
- It is not a dating app. It never matches you with strangers, and it is about people you already know.
- It is not a medical app. It does not diagnose, and nothing it says is medical advice.
- It is not a tracker on anyone’s phone. Nobody is followed, and Sunli does not use your location.
Where things stand
Sunli is not ready yet. The design is finished and the first version is being built.
There is no app to download today and no list to join. When there is a way to hear from us, it will be on this page.
One part of it works already, here on the site: When can I ring?
Written on 14 November 2026.